I know I am a stranger talking about the elephant in the room. Yes, we all notice but refuse to speak. It’s taken me many years to be able to have the courage to do so myself.
Don’t get me wrong, I believe there are many beautiful hearted women out there that give all their hearts to their step Children but yet the reverse is very true.
At a very young age, I lost my biological mother and my father remarried; absolutely his choice and I do not question his intentions at that time. This action however would have been fine by me if I had gained a mother, but I didn’t. It was a start of a long childhood that left me grieving the loss of my mother every chance I could.
With that said, I would like to ask you to think about a few things;
- Your step child, is just as precious as your own biological children; all created in the image of God.
- Your step child perhaps longs to be loved with a mother’s touch and words of a mother that you are very capable of giving.
- Have a little compassion for your step child as you would with your own.
- Your step child is your part of your husband’s package that you were very much aware of. Embrace your husband fully by loving his child.
- Remember that it’s okay for your step child to grieve the loss of their mother. Their grieving is not an indication of disrespect to you in anyway.
- Give your step child a chance to talk about their biological mother. That woman is part of who they are.
- Be fair in the way you treat your step child compared to your own.
- Keep in mind that your biological children could one day be under the guidance of a stepmother….how would you want them treated? Think about that in regard to the way you treat your step child.
- If you don’t desire to love your step child, at least do not break them.
- Give your step child a reason to call the house you run “home”. Let your house be a place worth coming back to.
- Your step child is actually sibling to your biological children. Don’t let your treatment towards them destroy the potential of a sibling relationship.
- Remember, that child maybe Motherless and defenseless but God is watching every second!
A step child
P.S. As a step child, I know for sure I was no saint either. There were times when I could have loved my stepmom and I did not. And I hope and pray that as step children, we will daily seek to honor God and our parents in the homes He has placed us.