marriage

Loving my groom; the vows

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Our wedding vows; are not just empty words. They are not words meant to please us on our wedding day. They are words of a promise made to God before our spouse. They are vows we must seek to keep. They don’t assure a fairly tell time throughout. No! Not at all. Some days will be amazing, some will be rocky but we must still hold tight onto our vows to God. As we enter into marriage, we must remember that we both are human and are indeed bound to sin or perhaps even find it challenging to keep our vows along the way. But then we are to focus beyond ourselves knowing that it’s not about us but Christ. He knows our hearts and is faithful to give us Grace and to walk us through those hard to understand days. Faithful to bind our marriages in his Word and set us only on his foundation and a path that is glorifying to Him.

“For better for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part”……We are not to choose moments when we just want to stay because our wants are being met; even when days are not as fluff as fairy tales, individually we ought to remember that we have a promise to keep. We have vows made in the presence of God. Holding the fact that together we will stay until he takes us home. This is no simple joke to me and neither should it be for any married friends out there.

Ephesians 5:25-27,  Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.

A Husband is commanded to love his wife as Christ has loved the church. Christ did not give up on his church. That comparison is not by mistake. It’s big and it’s heavy. It shows beyond a doubt how far our grooms ought to go. The burden, the pain, and the great love that is selfless. The church in this case being the bride; the church that will love the groom too, will seek to remain pure.

One may ask instances of continuous infidelity or perhaps abuse in the marriage. Like I mentioned in Ephesians 5:25-27, the husband must love his wife as Christ has loved the church. Most definitely I know that does not indicate an abusive husband nor a cheating husband who prides themselves in doing it. The groom/husband sets out to love and protect his bride as he has been commanded by God. Not to cause her heart to grow weary. As wives should do the same.

This June my husband and I will be married 9 beautiful years and I know someone that has been married longer may question my knowledge about marriage. Perhaps you are right to question. But for the years I have experienced marriage, I fully understand that there is no human trick to a perfect marriage. It’s either God’s way (Him being the creator of the marriage institution) or no way at all.

For the first few years of our marriage, I remember trying to read every marriage book I could lay my hands on hoping that would guide me into curving the “perfect marriage”. Those books failed me and I know for sure the authors of those books perhaps also experience struggles here and there in their own marriages. My husband and I decided one book would be the guide to our marriage; The Bible!!!.. This guide will never fail us if we obey through its instructions.

Just like anything in this life, marriage may at times fill like walking in the desert without hope for a drop of rain. But one fact I am sure of is that we have to let God lead us; changing our hearts, leading us to have compassion and grace towards one another, helping us to forgive, molding our characters into willingness to serve one another, giving us the strength to be patient and most definitely not give up on one another, creating kindness in our hearts and most definitely giving us perseverance. All for the glory of Him who created us, given us marriage, has loved us, loves us and has forgiven us.

22 thoughts on “Loving my groom; the vows

    1. 53!!!. That is absolutely beautiful. Anne you are right… Leaning on God is key and continuing to learn is wonderful. I look forward to one day celebrating 53 with my groom. Thank you for stopping by💞

  1. This will be 20 years for us…went by in a blink…my rock, my partner, my love. It’s been a wonderful ride. So glad I found your beautiful blog. 🙂

    1. Thank you so much for stopping by. I am deeply humbled. 20 years!!! wow. I know I could learn so much from you. Words of wisdom are very welcome here. Thank you again.

  2. Nine years is wonderful! We will celebrate twelve this year in August. We too have found that God’s instruction always trumps people’s advice. Thanks for sharing this message and encouragement!

  3. “Just like anything in this life, marriage may at times fill like walking in the desert without hope for a drop of rain. But one fact I am sure of is that we have to let God lead us; changing our hearts, leading us to have compassion and grace towards one another, helping us to forgive, molding our characters into willingness to serve one another, giving us the strength to be patient and most definitely not give up on one another, creating kindness in our hearts and most definitely giving us perseverance.”
    That the beautiful portion I took home to use in holding together my marriage that’s presently going through a desert experience.thanks, let’s keep writing!

    1. Thank you my brother in Christ. I pray that God will guide you and your bride through this season. He is sovereign and faithful to change any hard circumstance we go through in life and turn it into something good for His glory.

  4. We just celebrated 44 years years on the 10th 🙂 And I wonder where all that time went. It’s a journey in which both have to carry their share and work together to keep going. It’s often the hard times that cement the love and make it even stronger. May you have many, many, many more years of love and happiness.
    Thank you so much for following my blog. You have a lovely family – you all look so happy in the photos.

    1. 44!!. That is absolutely beautiful. And yes you are right, it takes working together as a unit. Trusting God to give us the strength to love and give grace when days are hard. Much,much love to you and stay blessed.

  5. Thank you for your words. I believe you nailed it on the head when you mentioned the books that didn’t provide a “perfect marriage”. Perfection of any sort is one of the biggest lies Satan tells us. We are not perfect and therefore our relationships cannot be perfect. We must treat one another with grace, mercy and love that is possible only through Christ.

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